Coffin Contents and Decoration

Families can choose how they wish to present their loved one’s coffin. Most families choose some type of floral arrangement (see my previous blog). Other things that can be considered are usually representative of the person. Having flowers doesn’t exclude other memorabilia – a combination is often chosen.

Families may choose to have a photograph of the deceased. This can be stood on the coffin (if it is in a frame with a stand), or leant up against a coffin placed on the catafalque at the crematorium. If the photograph is very large, it may be better displayed separately on an easel, table or shelf depending on the venue’s facilities. Some families choose to have more than one photo, and may even include family photos or ones of family members who have already passed away.

Deceased with military connections or who are particularly patriotic may ask for the coffin to be draped in a flag. When a deceased has won medals, they can be displayed on a medal cushion. Flags and medal cushions can sometimes be provided by the Funeral Director, or the family can provide their own.

During a Catholic service in church, the coffin is sometimes covered by the pall (a cloth covering from the Latin Pallium, a cloak) that is the property of the church. The flowers are removed and placed to one side, then the cloth is ceremoniously unfolded onto the coffin and the priest places a bible and cross on top of it. At the end of the service in church, the ceremony is repeated in reverse and the flowers placed back on the coffin lid for its journey onwards.

In some funeral celebrations, the family request a candle lighting ceremony. If this is the case, the celebrant will provide the candle. It should be noted that in order to comply with Health and Safety regulations, a lit candle must be an electric one. The celebrant positions the candle at the start of the service and removes it at the end.

Other items positioned on the coffin can be very varied. I have seen soft toys, alcohol, drinking glasses, hats, leather jackets, golf clubs, cricket bats, ceremonial jackets and so on. I once had a family that was very keen on vegetables and we had a lovely selection placed in a basket on the coffin.

Sometimes it follows that items that are not allowed by law to be placed inside a coffin are placed on top, or it may just be that the family wish to retain the item.

If a burial is taking place, most things are allowed. The official exception being cremated remains in the coffin. The deceased can be dressed in whatever the family wish, including shoes and belts. I have known them have lighters, trinkets, electrical goods, glass, alcohol, cuddly toys and the rest.

In the case of cremation, it is different in that the crematoria in Great Britain have to comply with the Clean Air Act. Their emissions are monitored by computers. The Funeral Director has to complete official paperwork stating that the coffin and contents comply with the standards and it is their responsibility to advise their clients what is and what is not allowed.

In my area, leather isn’t allowed nor synthetic materials, glass or anything which may explode. If a deceased has been fitted with a pacemaker, it must be removed either by the hospital, or if the death occurred in the community, the Funeral Director will arrange for it to be done.

The cremation authorities vary in their interpretation of the law. Some will not allow a deceased to wear their own clothes for cremation, allowing only shrouds.

If families sneak cremated remains into a coffin which is to be cremated, it should be noted that they will be discovered at the end of the cremation process. Cremated remains are very dense (being highly reduced) and, as such, their form is not altered by a second cremation and they are recognisable for what they are. Serious questions would be asked! Families who wish to put deceased together are advised to mix the remains after two separate cremations.

Deceased can be cremated in their jewellery, but it should be noted that jewellery is destroyed by the intense temperatures of the process. It is then separated from the ash and either disposed of in an environmentally friendly way by the crematorium staff or returned to the family. Families are usually asked their wishes at the time of the arrangement. If families ask for the metal residue, the only parts that are recognisable are artificial joints, as they can stand the intense heat.

This blog, like my others, is meant to provide food for thought. Your Funeral Director is there to support you with informed choices and advice.

Funeral Flowers

The choice here is obviously down to the family – I would just like to run through some of the options.

At the point of arranging a funeral, the Funeral Director will usually ask the family if they require assistance in this matter. The family can use the Funeral Directing service to choose their requirements, usually from a brochure, and the payment will be included in the final funeral invoice. Alternatively, they may recommend a florist that they work with on a regular basis. If families have their own florist that they are happy with, I would normally recommend them to stick with what they know.

Some families, if they are struggling with loss, prefer to give the organising to someone else and really appreciate the professional involvement.

The majority of florists do funeral flowers and have brochures and price lists available. Local florists may deliver free of charge but a small charge may apply so don’t forget to check. The flowers can’t be ordered until the funeral is booked (day and time). A delivery time for the flowers can then be organised and the delivery location set.

Flowers can go to the deceased’s house, the funeral home or the funeral venue. They can also be collected by family members at a time to suit them.

The majority of funeral services in my area tend to include cremation. Main flowers travel on the coffin on its journey to the service. In a lot of instances, families request ‘Family flowers only’ and ask for donations in lieu of the flowers to go to a chosen charity. This is also sometimes the case with burials.

It is usually just the flowers on the top of the coffin that are taken into the church or cremation chapel. The Funeral Director will follow the family’s instructions and advise according to the establishment’s rules. Special tributes may be placed on the catafalque or the floor.

Following the service, if a cremation has been requested, the flowers are displayed and are then either removed by the family or left on display in the crematorium grounds.

Flowers displayed may be moved the following day to another area, depending on the crematorium setup. If left at the crematorium, they are usually disposed of within a week to make room for new funerals.

In the case of burials, the flowers will be displayed graveside for the completion of the service, usually on green matting. When the mourners have left, the grave is filled in and any flowers are arranged by the grave diggers upon the grave. It is up to the family to dispose of the flowers when they have deteriorated and most cemeteries provide metal bins for this purpose.

The choice of what arrangements people can have is vast. Gone are the days from the past when wreaths of laurels and lilies were the traditional funeral flowers. It must be said that not everyone chooses to have flowers. Budget may also come into play and costs can range from about £3 for a single flower to many thousands of pounds especially if the family plan to decorate the church.

Let us look at some possibilities starting with the more common:

• Casket sprays. These can be double or single ended in whatever colour(s) the family want. Particular flowers can be requested but, bear in mind that this may add to the cost. Flowers in season provide the best value for money. Size can vary considerably from a couple feet long to a full coffin top.

• Bouquets. A lot of the above applies. I would always recommend open bouquets and limited wrapping so you can actually see the flowers. Cellophane tends to steam up. The advantage of bouquets is that they are more versatile after the funeral – for example, they could be taken home and placed in vases.

• Named tributes. This may be, for example, ‘MUM’, ‘DAD’, a person’s name etc., usually with a chrysanthemum or open flower base. Florists usually charge by the letter. This type of arrangement does not travel on top of the coffin but is placed at the back or sides of the hearse deck. At the service, they may be taken in but are not normally placed on top of the coffin. Discuss this aspect of placement with the Funeral Director. If a burial has been chosen, the tribute would be placed on the filled grave. In the case of cremation, there is little that can be done with the arrangement afterwards unless the family wish to remove it to their own garden or a family grave.

• Religious tributes. These are not as popular as they used to be, but would include such things as crosses, wreaths, pearly gates, angels etc.

• Tributes that represent the deceased’s interests or work connections. These can be anything you like. Some examples I have seen are; fire engine, rugby ball, football pitch, cricket bat, dog, cat, teddy bear, butterfly, spanner and guitar.

• Single flowers. Some people choose to have a single flower from a loved one or single flowers placed on the coffin by mourners. Single flowers devoid of plastic can normally stay with the coffin through the cremation process if it is requested. Some families have a last act of placing flowers at the end of the service both at the crematorium and after final prayers at the graveside. Flowers can been thrown into the grave as well as or instead of soil.

As I have said, flowers are a very personal thing, but I hope this blog post has helped you.